day 657

I was approved for disability going back to October of 2005. They have a mandatory 6 month waiting period so I'll be getting compensation starting from April of 2006. I won't get the back pay right away but it will come. First I'll get a check for June and then we'll get the back pay in either one lump sum or in a few split up payments. I'll be getting money every month on about the second Wednesday of the month, directly deposited into our checking account.

This is a Godsend. We've been so tight on finances it's been painful. The extra money will enable us to get the rider mower fixed, get a little second vehicle so one can be here in case I need it, we can fix the garage door, and several other things we've had to let go because we just didn't have the financial wherewithal to do the stuff that needed to be done.

Once things are caught up and bills are paid we're going to start adding a few hundred dollars a month to the mortgage payments so we can pay it off early. If I can put an extra $500 a month into the mortgage we can subtract $6K a year from the principal and eat away at the interest we have to pay as well, which means we could conceivably pay off the property in less than 10 years. That would be 14 years early. That would be darn nice.

The pain has been horrid the last few days because of the stress I'm under with Kenny being sick and the weather and all kinds of crap including not nearly enough sleep. I had to take a Maxalt the other day while I was at the hospital and then had to hang out for 8 hours or so until I was safe to drive home. What a mess.

I need to tell the pain doc when I see him that I need something stronger for breakthrough and that I need the Methadone dose increased. I can't live like this for the rest of my life. I need relief from this pain. It's messing with my life way too much. I don't ask to be pain free, but I think to expect me to live with the pain at a level of 5 all the time is unrealistic.

We'll see what happens. He may refuse. I can only do what I can do.