Monday, January 09, 2006

94 days in pain

This is getting old. Last week I had a bit of a reprieve but now my old friend is back with a vengeance. Not that I didn't have headaches last week, but they were mild as far as my headaches go. Starting yesterday the intensity returned. I hate what it's doing to my life. I have to cancel plans and stay in the dark house, trying to fight the pain. I don't like taking the meds unless I have to, and I don't think I have to unless it gets so bad I'm tempted to go to the ER.

I had plans for today. I'm not sure I'll see them all fulfilled. My youngest daughter needs to go to her WIC appointment, which I can handle, but she also wanted me to take her to their old place to pick up a bunch of stuff and I'm just not sure I can handle being out that long with my head doing what it's already doing this morning. We may have to do it tomorrow, or in two trips on two days instead of getting it all done at once.

I was going to go with oldest daughter to the mall yesterday and had to cancel that, too.

Thursday I see the headache doctor again. I'm going to talk with him about the deeper nerve block thing since the stuff I've seen on it indicates it's not all that successful with ATN. In fact, it usually makes things worse. Our family has a weird history of having strange side effects to things so I don't want to take a chance on something that might leave the right side of my head permanently numb if there's not a lot of data to back up that it works in the majority of cases. I just have too many freak things happen to me to play that game.

I slept most of yesterday away. I think I took 4 or 5 naps. I did get a crib quilt cut out but nothing beyond that. I didn't even cook dinner. Well, maybe I did...if chicken tenders in the toaster oven count as dinner. Anyhow, hubby had to take a frozen dinner to work today because we didn't have any leftovers for him to take. I feel crappy when I feel so crappy I can't even cook. That sucks.

If I wasn't out of some of my necessary meds I wouldn't go anywhere today, either, but I am out and have to go pick them up. I'm going to do the necessary shopping while I'm at WalMart and then I won't have to do much more in that area until the weekend. I know it's childish to say, but I'm splurging and getting Diet Pepsi for hubby and Diet Coke for me. I tried the generic stuff last time and it just doesn't quite cut it. I guess I'll just have to spend that extra 3 bucks to get the real stuff.

To take a pill or not to take a pill...not...I can't drive if I do, and I have to drive today...maybe some Extra Strength Tylenol will help a bit. I don't dare do the Vicodin or the DHE. They make me basically useless.

I'd like just an hour or two with no pain. I've forgotten how that feels.

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